From Sandy:

Dear Fellow Americans,

The federal government is sending each and every one of us a $600 rebate.If we spend that money at Wal-Mart, the money will go to China. If we spend it on gasoline it will go to the Arabs, if we purchase a computer it will go to India, if we purchase fruit and vegetables it will go to Mexico,Honduras, and Guatemala, if we purchase a good car it will go to Japan, if we purchase useless crap it will go to Taiwan and none of it will help the American economy.

The only way to keep that money here at home is to buy prostitutes and beer, since these are the only products still produced in the US!

Thank you for your help.
Ex Govenor Eliot Spitzer

From Ken:

(Forgot to note where I snagged this one from... sorry!) Click to enlarge for easier reading.

True Obama story from Wordsmith and Townhall:

There are no free lunches in politics. Barack Obama may have learned that about breakfasts as well when he stopped by the Four Seasons Family Restaurant on Tuesday for some last-minute politicking. On the day of primary elections in Indiana and North Carolina, Obama trolled for last-minute undecided votes in this Indianapolis suburb. "Take this, we'll seal the deal," a man in a booth eating breakfast with three male companions told the Illinois senator as they chatted about the election. He held up their breakfast check. Agreeing, Obama snatched the bill quickly. "I've got your check," Obama said. The man, Steve Czajkowski, 39, tried to grab it back, telling Obama he was only joking and that he didn't expect the presidential candidate to pay for their breakfasts. But Obama persisted and walked off grasping the check firmly. Czajkowski, who told reporters the check totaled about $25, said, "I like his message. I like the way he's running his campaign." But had Obama won his vote? Well, not exactly, said Czajkowski, who said he was working as a pastor at the Greenwood Community Church, "I'm Canadian," he said.
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From Ken:

From Old Soldier:

A Bit of History (from The Jungle Hut)

Most people don't know that back in 1912 Hellmann's mayonnaise was manufactured in England . In fact, the Titanic was carrying 12,000 jars of the condiment scheduled for delivery in Vera Cruz, Mexico , which was to be the next port of call for the great ship after its stop in New York . This would have been the largest single shipment of mayonnaise ever delivered to Mexico . But as we know, the great ship did not make it to New York. The ship hit an iceberg and sank, and the cargo was forever lost. The people of Mexico , who were crazy about mayonnaise, and were eagerly awaiting its delivery, were disconsolate at the loss. Their anguish was so great, that they declared a National Day of Mourning, which they still observe to this day. The National Day of Mourning occurs each year on May 5th and is known, of course, as ---Sinko de Mayo. ;)
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When I was young it was not all the rage to have pouty lips. Kids thought it was cool to to say that there must have been an African American somewhere in the woodpile regarding my genealogy, only back then they didn't say "African American". But things have changed and nowdays pouty lips are all the rage. This Google add tells it all... ROTFALMBO!